Tuesday, June 26, 2012


So I'm feeling a bit panicked.  Tomorrow is our Foster Care Home Visit.  I feel like I should have gotten the carpets cleaned or finished decorating any room in our house.  I joke with people all the time that decorating is not my forte.  We have lived in this house for 4+ years and it looks like we could of moved in a month ago, that's how bare bones it is.  See the picture of me in skinny jeans several posts ago.  Notice, white blank walls.  I feel like I should organize the book shelf where books are so stuffed and packed it looks like one wrong pull and a dozen books may drop out.  I worry that there are a dozen dangers I have failed to comprehend, because of my laid back parenting style.

I worry that the kids will expose some dirty little family secret, like I have a child who picks its nose and eats it.  Not because they don't realize it, but because they like the taste.  Gender and name will remain nameless.  Serious shame I am feeling here people.  I know it's gross, but what do you do?  Also I worry that they will reveal that I have a child who hates underwear and so rarely wears them or that when they hurt themselves instead of coddling them I say, "You're fine."  I worry that they will reveal that I don't buy my kids fishing licenses - okay I just looked this up before admitting to illegal behavior, and it turns out I don't need one if they are twelve and under.  Good no law breaking here.  I worry that they will tell the woman that I let them undo their seat belt while driving to pick something off the floor or help another sibling and then quickly rebelt without pulling over to the side of the road, possible law breaking.  I worry that of all the things I say and do something will make me unfit to care for the neglected and abused children in the foster care system.

I'm panicked because the day after all this goes down Travis and I are going on Pioneer Trek.  What's pioneer trek?  Well it's where the youth of our church and several hand picked adult couples go to the middle of nowhere state game lands where we will to the best of our abilities and with reasonable safety measures reenact what is was like for the early members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to travel across the country with handcarts and limited supplies.  So it's the equivalent of really rough camping, so while I am trying to order the house for the home visit, I am also trying to gather supplies and camp gear into a somewhat contained and neat fashion to supply my husband and I and 10 adopt-a-children with as much stuff as allowable so that we won't be miserable.  And I am panicked because I know that I would rather go sit by the pool instead of do these last minute things, and you know what I just might...I'll let you know in a day or two.

1 comment:

kbhull said...

how did it go???