Wednesday, March 31, 2021

Is It Really Failure?

This week was a week of misses and near misses.  Travis was in a "Biggest Loser" competition through his work.  The competition ran from January through the end of March.  Each week they would weigh in on Fridays and a leaderboard was published on Mondays.  Prizes would be awareded to the top three biggest losers based on percent lost.  Travis has been in the lead the last few weeks, but Monday he learned that he dropped to 2nd place by .04%.  It was so close.  He was disappointed, but he is pretty resilient and when we spoke I reminded him that he would still get a prize even if it wasn't the one he had set his heart on, he had lost 27lbs in 3 months, and he was enjoying food more than ever before as he made much more conscious choices and eliminated so much junk food.  So I have to ask, did he really fail?

Then Wyatt yesterday shouts, I knew it.  Immediately I was worried.  He was waiting on National Honors Society officer results for next year, his senior year.  He had not been awarded an officer role, but he had correctly predicted every person in their particular role that was chosen.  Clearly he was disappointed to not become the President which was his hope, but he decided it would probably be okay to not have an additional responsibility next year. He was still confident about his leadership skills, knew he was academically doing just fine, and has been granted many other opportunities to lead in and out of school. Additionally he got his SAT scores back and he wasn't sure how to feel.  He hadn't gotten a perfect score, but he still did quite well.  I asked him what score he had hoped for and he admitted he hadn't really set a goal at all.  So I had to ask him, did you really fail then?

Last, as I near the end of my Master's Program I have just my Internship 1 and Internship 2 to finish.  This requires an interviewing, application process, and basically a matching program.  You ideally apply to 3-5 places.  Within a short period not only my school, but the two other graduate schools with counseling students all apply simultaneously.  There are limited positions, high hour demands need to be met and if the position you are seeking can't supply enough hours you need to get a second internships site, additionally you need to get a certain amount of individual counseling done as well as group counseling.  It gets sort of cut throat competitive in San Antonio in end of March. I finished interviewing today at three sights.  First sight had over 50 apply, 20 interview and were accepting 2 interns.  Second sight only allowed 20 to apply, 12 interview, but had 4 spots.  The last sight had about 50 apply, most interviewed, but only 10 spots.  I'm still waiting to hear what happens with two of them, but today I was offered one position on the spot before they even finished with the interviewing process.  So even if I don't get my first choice, I ask myself - have I really failed?

My friend and I were talking about this the other day.  In the world we live, there are so many opportunities, experiences, adventures, and choices.  Often it can feel overwhelming. It can almost feel like if you aren't getting the thing you want most that you are failing, but I reminded her that we live in a world where more often than not we are deciding between two great choices, when we fell short of our goals we are still reaching amazing growth opportunities, when we don't win we are still winning.  Truly we are blessed, living in prosperous times, and setting and achieving amazing things within our families, our communities, and our churches.  It really is true that failing forward is not failing at all!