Monday, May 27, 2013

Bachelorette Season Premier Highights

Well it's official.  Desiree has all the tools she needs to be a handy woman.  I don't know which was worse, the guy who showed up in stiff full metal armor approaching both the stairs into the house and Desiree with stilted terminator steps or the guy who asked, "Will you accept these abs?" appearing shirtless straight from the limo,.  On this guy's plus column is the fact that he is totally hot and practically a neighbor to my husband's Texas roots, but still everything about him screams douche baggery even in his job title which is Drilling Fluid Engineer. 

One thing is for sure.  I have never seen a lot of men look this awful in suits since my high school prom.  The wardrobe people must know that the casting is done so that when they spend the rest of the season predominantly undressed they will look good, but that doesn't translate well to a sample rack suit.  So when most of the men have upper bodies that are bigger than The Incredible Hulk, invariably the sleeves are too short and the buttons strained.  Add to that eye sore filled visual some very short suit pants, due to very large although deliciously "bite"able tushes from all the gym hours and you are starting to get the picture.  Last, top that off with a bunch of hipsters sporting totally inappropriate shoes, think Converse, sneakers, and other assorted non-formal footwear.  All that I can say is Eeks.

In typical fashion the season was filled with awkward dancing and poetry, manipulation via children from previous relationships, cheesy sentiments, fiery magic, the worst self designed suit possibly ever made and assorted riff raff nonsense.  The most awful by far were the ER doctor who while having one on one time takes off and puts on his glasses repeatedly, seriously no fewer than 6 times in their conversation and pair him with uber creeper guy who had some seriously misguided fantasy suite seeking idea on night one that skeeved Des out to where she gives him the boot before the Rose Ceremony even happens. 

In the end, one thing remains the same as with other seasons, I am totally riveted.  Can't wait to find out what my new tag line of stupidity will be for the upcoming year.  And hopefully I won't unwittingly be repeatedly saying something sexually graphic to people like last year before someone explained what it meant to me.  Sorry folks.  I guess the old adage is true.  You learn something new everyday, even through the Bachelor/Bacherlorette Franchise.  Hope you enjoy watching as much as me!

1 comment:

The Doctors Wife said...

I think there are only a handful of "normal" guys in her bunch. I hope she is able to narrow it down fast because I'm not sure how much idiot can handle. I haven't watched for a couple of years but the family of one of the guys (Brooks) is in my ward so I am watching to see what happens there.