Time After Time

Since I was a young girl I have been obsessed with time. I remember being very young and asking my mother about eternity. Being a girl who measured things in increments specifically designed to keep time, the concept eluded me. I couldn’t get my head around it and still to this day I struggle to understand a concept so vague and indefinable.

This morning I was reading in the Book of Mormon and was around the end of 3rd Nephi and 4th Nephi. It is where Christ visits the Americas, ordains apostles, performs miracles, and then leaves. I am always in awe at the state of Zion they describe and then just as quickly appalled to realize that in less than 200 years they go back to having Nephites and Lamanites as well as more than the one church Christ had established with his own hands and priesthood power.

I read a book about the Holocaust recently, and it is with this same sense of disgust that I am horrified to realize that this happened less than a hundred years ago, less than seventy five years ago. This happened in my mother’s lifetime. Even more horrifying is that the Germans got this concept from us, the Americans. In the early 1900’s America had thirty some states that allowed eugenics to be performed. Not only are these things laced throughout our history, but only so recently has racism and other important horrible cultural issues of our time been eliminated. When you think that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has only been restored around 178 years, the 200 hundred year change from Christ and Zion to everyday mediocrity doesn’t seem so quick after all.

When I think of a life 200 years from now I don’t know what they will think of us. And I am not sure what era I will be grouped with. But as I imagine this future one reality remains the same - no matter what I can’t avoid being grouped with human eugenics, racism, and major wars being fought worldwide. Maybe we are more like the Nephites and Lamanites than I ever imagined. Maybe the concept of time that has preoccupied my mind for so long, I will never wrap my brain around. Time will forever elude me. Because time is all just relative and eternity is just a little easier to grasp after all.

My New Bible

About a month ago, I happened to find one of best books ever written. Practical in everyway but more importantly critical to the raising of our children, this book makes more sense and has changed my outlook on parenting more than any one thing in the last seven years of my parenting experience. In some parts I was screaming my agreement while in others I was forced to realistically view my own parenting techniques. Not always fun, but always helpful in improving. Such quotes that resonated with me are as follows:

“Parenting is not an engineering task, it’s an endurance task. It requires patience and a high tolerance for boredom. Engineering is based on the gathering of knowledge so that if you do something right the first time, you don’t have to do it over and over again. Efficiency, however, is inimical to child rearing. Parenting is a problem to be solved everyday. It’s a repetitive quotidian task. That’s what maximizes parent-child interaction and persuades children that they are loved. Seeing kids as a well-designed product is a disease of really smart people. They feel they have to make it a task worthy of their time.”

“Just because medication works doesn’t make it an ethical substitute for giving kids the proper attention at home and school.”

“[Parenting] is the sole source of their self-esteem. People misunderstand what parenting is all about. In truth, you don’t have to be really smart to be a good parent. You have to be imperfect and you have to be reliable. It requires empathy and a fair amount of self-knowledge on the part of the parents. But you don’t have to be brilliant.”

“[Attachment] doesn’t take flash cards, Baby Einstein, or Mommy and Me classes. It doesn’t require custom-made nursery furniture or cashmere swaddling blankets.”

“Parental perfectionism inhibits creativity, curiosity, and innovation; it creates a classroom where only results matter. It makes children unwilling to experiment, explore the unknown, or take even the slightest risk.”

At this point I know you are all dying to read this book and are wondering the title. It really will change your parenting, and if it doesn’t than you suck. The book is, “A Nation of Wimps: The High Cost of Invasive Parenting”. I encourage everyone to read it, buy it, loan it from the library or a friend. Happy Reading!

Just Say the Word

We went to York today to have a cousin party. It is always a fun time. On the way home it was very close to nap time and I was trying to keep the boys awake so they would nap when we got home instead. I knew I needed to keep them talking or laughing to stay awake and the talking was getting progressively harder. So I went for the laughing and I went straight to boy humor. I started saying things like poopy head and other potty humor things. Worked like a charm the giggles continued for the last thirty minutes of the car trip with knock knock jokes containing the word fart and making no sense at all. Tell me what it is about boys that from as early as two this makes them laugh.

I'm Not Going to Argue

I have a friend who is always telling me what a charmed life I lead. At first I was resistant to believe it. I wanted to recount to her all the woes my life has. It made me almost feel defensive, like I had to try and justify why I had such a good life and some other people don’t seem to. But I am working on just saying thank you when I receive compliments instead of saying “I know” or denying them. This seemed like a compliment. As I spent the next week or so contemplating this statement I realized some things perhaps not for the first time.

My husband is not only the sweetest man ever, but he is a genius and I love to hear about his ideas and how he revolutionizes his workplace with his ideas. He is sexy in an unintimidating way, and it doesn’t hurt that when we walk into a room together I immediately size up the looks of all the other men and mention to him that he is usually the hottest or in the top three.

I have the best friends anyone could ever hope for. They are women of faith who are strong, smart, and capable; they are mentally stable and not too crazy. They are the perfect combination of fun and serious.

My family is amazing and perhaps some of the funniest people I have ever known. All of us love a good time and so put us all in a room together and often times I am snorting laughter, tears rolling down my face, squeezing the pee in till I reach the bathroom. They are amazingly generous and my best friends.

As for me I seem to be relatively talented. This was perhaps the hardest thing to accept hearing from my friend, since I am my own worst critic. I can play sports, sing and play the piano, I can draw a little, I am relatively intelligent, and I love to learn anything I don’t know. Those talents I lack I work really hard to get good at even if it is just for a mini project or short time. Hello decorating skills here I come.

Now this all might seem quite self congratulatory and egocentric, perhaps it is, but what I realized more than anything is that although I am really blessed (and Heavenly Father gets all the credit there) my life is so good because of one main reason. I choose to be happy. That is the kind of person I am. I am not a whiner, complainer, moaner, etc… If something is wrong I may confide in a few close friends but otherwise I am sucking it up, dwelling on the positive, looking for the next spectacular moment life has to offer me. I love to have a good time and therefore make most anything I am involved in a good time. Ah, life is good, and I am not arguing. I do lead a charmed life.

From My Archives

4th pic tag

1. go to your pics
2. upload the 4th pic of the 4th folder
3. post
4. your turn.

Truth be told I looked at this picture before deciding to do this or not. It took me down memory lane, but will probably not mean much to all of you. It was July 4th, at Benj and Mindee's house one of the times they lived in Utah. All the kids watching Benj's firework display.

The best 4th picture tag I have seen is on my friend Panda's blog. Blog stalk her to see the picture and read the story - it is the best part. A great idea for sure.

On another note: fun story of my day - I have a visiting teaching appointment this morning at ten. My companion calls around nine to say she can't make it her son is sick. We go. Having a newly potty trained boy I took him pee right before we left the house. Once we got there I asked him if he had to pee just to be sure. No was his reply. We were talking all of five minutes when the other kids come up and say we can't play down there with the smell of poop. Oh no, Issac I just asked. Every mom can sympathize when I say it was his first bout with diarrhea since being potty trained. Fun times my friends fun times. And yes it smelled rank, could not wash the smell off my hands, could not sanitize the smell off my hands. Came home and dipped those babies in pure bleach.

Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

...that's what little boys are made of. And here is what my little boys are made of.
Here is Issac sans toenail. It happened a week ago. It only took 13 days after the original incident for that baby to fall off. And here is his little scab. It is still this red, yet he continues to be the crazy man daredevil that although amusing now I know when he is a teenager will keep me up at nights worryingThis is Wyatt at the park not really what the story is about, but a reference point nonetheless. He is about to be five in January. This week's boy moment occurs as we are getting out of the car on Saturday. I pull open the van door and he jumps into my arms so I can lower him to the ground. On the way down he gives me the ole "tune in Tokyo" cop a feel. I say, "Wyatt why did you do that?" He says with a cheshire grin even the cat himself can't match "Because they are all squishy." This is when I turn to my not so little boy anymore (Travis) like help me out here. And he with his signature chuckle, which has earned him the nickname of Mr. Chuckles among our friends and famliy says, "He's right, they are."

Kody is starting to walk a little, but is so sweet. I can see the beginning stages of corruption occuring as he gets older, but in the meantime I am going to cherish my moments like these.

And that is the boy update around our house.

I Am Weak

I know that I am crazy, silly, stupid what have you, but today I could no longer resist. I had to give in. The anticipation had been building for days. It was all I could think about. It started about a week ago, but then the weather got really warm again and I forgot about it. Yesterday a new weather front was coming in and as I felt the change in the air I kept going to the piano and playing a few bars and then this morning the chilly air was here.

And so after much internal debate I pulled out my Christmas CD's and jammed for a bit. A new favorite is Jewel Christmas which I got last year. Thanks Elizabeth and I love you. Publically recorded for everyone to hear. The emotional constipations has been unblocked thank you. I sang my heart out. I gave into my love for the holiday season that is kicked off with Halloween. I know I'll have to put them away shortly because otherwise I'll be tired of them by Christmas, but man I feel like the biggest relief has come. Whew.

Forgive me for I have sinned. Christmas music in October.

Men Lock Up Your Wives

Last night was our ward book club. Many people ended up not showing up. So there were four of us. Four that I really liked. The person who was hosting it at her house was tired and we felt obligated to leave, although a friend and I weren't quite ready to go home yet. We stood in the road by the curb and our cars talking. And talking apparently. When I finally said it was time to go, I jumped in my car to see that it was 11:15. Wow with no watch time can get away from you. Solviej, my friend, said my husband is going to be worried. I knew that Travis wouldn't be.

When I arrived home the house was dark, everyone asleep. When I slipped into bed, Travis was roused just enough to say that Tad, Solviej's husband, had called Travis with worry and asked (loosely quoting here) "Did your wife run off with my wife." Travis was to return his call when I got home. So at midnight he is like we have to call Tad. I was like it's fine, she's home now. Travis ever polite said, I told him I would call. So he did. All was fine. Apparently though I am the wife thief. The girlfriend who is always up for a good time tempting the other wives away from traditional domesticity. I will snatch away the wives and take them to crazy places like dark neighborhood streets, ice cream shops, fast food restaurants, and if I could ever find anyone brave enough dance clubs.

As we are falling asleep though, Travis said "As I was getting out your stuff for bed (contact case, birth control, floss, and toothbrush) I noticed your wedding rings were in the drawer. A lot of other husbands would probably be worried, but with you I'm never worried." Now that is trust. Man I love my husband and our marriage. And just for all of you worriers, I was wearing my mom's wedding band, which is why mine were in the drawer.

Tagged By Mindee - And I'm Done

Tagged/ 5 Things

I've been Tagged by Mindee~
10 Years Ago I Was.......
1. stealing 3 dollars from my senior class fund and getting caught. Embarrasing.
2. mourning the absence of me on Homecoming Court.
3. applying to BYU. (who I can now hear laughing)
4. dreaming of some kind of collegiate freedom.
5. making Denny's runs with Whitney, Charlotte, Louis, Nate, and James.

Things on Todays List.........
1. fold laundry
2. go to Wal-Mart (maybe)
3. clean bathrooms
4. mow the lawn
5. sign a realtor agreement

Snacks I enjoy.......
1. french fries
2. funnel cakes
3. apple dumplings
4. doughnuts
5. chips and dips (me - weight problem? no)

Things I would do if I was a Millionaire.......
1. pay off my house
2. save/invest
3. travel
4. help others
5. wait and see

Places I have lived........
1. Pennsylvania
2. Idaho
3. Alaska
4. Utah
5. Georgia

Jobs I have had........
1. Farm Hand
2. Golden Corral Server
3. Dairy Queen
4. Caterer
5. Gym Teacher

Peeps I Tag............
1. In good conscience
2. I cannot
3. continue this
4. by tagging someone.
5. Sorry.

My Favorite Time of Day

It's the little moments that make life. Each day I understand this just a little more. And it was made very clear last night as Travis called to me from the living room "House is on". This is a show Travis and I have taken to watching lately.Prior to two weeks ago, each night was ended with us falling into bed at the end of the night with no energy to talk. I don't really know how it started, but Travis and I are now well into a habit of DVRing House. And each night as soon as the kids are in bed, we fall onto the couch together instead. And we cover up with a big, plaid, flannel comforter and sometimes fall asleep and sometimes stay awake, but at least it is something we do together every night. It is my favorite time of day, the time I carve out for us instead.

Chuckle Chuckle

So last night Travis was talking to the kids before bed. We put them to bed together and then I come downstairs and he stays to tell them a ranch story (him growing up) or a church history story. They picked a church history story and so he told them the story about Heber J. Grant having terrible handwriting and so he practiced till it was neat.

He went on to say the moral of the story is that you can be good at anything if you want to and you work hard at it and practice. This is the conversation I heard as I was cleaning up.
Travis: Wyatt what would you like to get good at?
Wyatt: (mumbled I can't hear)
Issac: (mumbled I can't hear)
Travis: What about you Bella?
Bella: I don't know. I'm pretty much good at everything.

And that is when I began to chuckle. Oh yeah, that's my Bella.

Sell My House

We are putting our house in Orem, Utah on the market for sale. Tentatively we are asking 179,900, but we have a brokers price opinion for 185,000. If you know anyone interested please let them know or send them to my site. Here are pictures of the house's front and back.
It has a great, fully fenced yard. .20 acres. It is 1500 sq. ft. Three bedrooms, 2 baths. Living room, kitchen/dining room combo, basement with laundry room, storage room and walk out garage.
Great shape on the inside. Brand new carpet (not shown in this picture), sesame wall (beige) with white trim. Tile kitchen and bathrooms. Great view of Timp, the Lake, and Nebo.
The person who brings me a buyer will be rewarded.

Chocolate Milk Before Bedtime

This is Bella. Bella is 6 and a half. She is my oldest girl and I love her to pieces. But a funny thing has started happening and I am not sure if I am prepared for it. She is on the cusp of being not so young anymore. This year she is in first grade and part of me wants to blame school for the destruction of her innocence. But a part of me knows that at this age she is going to start noticing things everywhere on tv, at school, when we go out - she is a watcher and a listener. Although she does her fair share of chatting too.

So when I see her getting ready to get in the bath and she stands in the mirror sucking in and saying mom I am this skinny holding out her hands the width of her, I worry. When she starts singing "tricker treat...give me something good to eat...I'll pull down your underwear" I worry. When she comes home crying because a girl at school doesn't want to be her friend anymore I worry. And when I see her repeating too much of what she sees and hears, I worry.

I can't protect and shelter her from everything much as I would like to sometimes, but that is why at the end of the day I am glad that she wants chocolate milk before bedtime. Because it means she still is the little girl she should be. When every other day or so she still takes a nap after school it means she's that little girl, and when she cuddles into my lap wanting to be held she's that little girl. Her growing up excites me but makes me nervous. What does the world hold for someone so special? Man I love my Bella roo.

Was It Just Me?

Or did Conference really just rock this year? Most of you reading this know exactly what I am talking about, but since I have a couple friends who don't here is the gist. General Conference happens twice a year in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, Mormon Church, where the prophet and other apostles speak to the members of the church.

I started Saturday morning and I was in a mood, a not great one. Anyway...as I sat around the computer watching my live stream it took no more than a few minutes for the spirit to surrond me. It felt like a bulky, fuzzy, worn out sweatshirt put on first thing on a cold morning or like climbing back into bed on a rainy morning. Honestly that is how much of a physical reaction I had to conference. And this was before I had even started listening to the words and messages. Of course it only got better and I was amazed at talk after talk. The afternoon session on Saturday kept my expectations going.

Then on Sunday I actually dressed and went into the church because I was giving a lady in our ward a ride. Although we were a little late, I was even more astonished that they could create within me an even stronger spiritual reaction. The afternoon session on Sunday was also good and I felt sad that is was ending already and that I had six more months to wait for it to occur again. Talk after talk was a step by step intructional guide for me and it came at a time where I am excited to embark on a self improvement journey.

So really was it just me or did the rest of you feel as amped about all this?

My Mistake...

So this morning I walk into Issac's room I can hear him awake. The stench is overwhelming. But it is amazing how I had the intuition before I even got there. It was like a flash of revelation warning/prepping me. As I walked down the hall to his room I thought, "Oh no, I never put a diaper on Issac last night." You see I had changed him into his pajamas but still knew it would be a half hour or so till bedtime. The last thing we do at night is change to a diaper. He isn't quite there yet in the potty training arena to make it the whole night through. I hoped there was a chance Travis had caught my mistake and diapered him, but no as I open the door the stench was overwhelming and there lay Issac shivering in vasts amounts of pee varying in temperature from different points in the night and morning. Ew gross, my mistake.

Only Here

Just an indiscriminate booth in the mall. Or is it. Growing up I always knew quite a few people who smoked; I even knew many who chewed. I thought that was pretty common having been raised here. After having lived a few more places, I realized it isn't. Not in Alaska, Georgia, Idaho, or Utah did I see people chewing, not really anyway. While at Bedford Springs I saw the best man, from a wedding held that day, put in his dip to sit around the bonfire pit still clad in his tux spitting away. Most of all I have never in living anywhere or visiting anywhere seen such a sight as this. Apparently they will meet all your tobacco needs no matter what form you take it in.

Story of the Toe

Sorry I failed to tell you all what actually happened with the toe. He was standing on a metal folding chair. The chair started to tip and on Issac's tumble to the ground his toe got caught in the folding action. It ripped from the bottom of the toe up causing the gouge below the toenail and most of the toenail is loose, minus one little corner holding on to dear life. This picture was taken before bedtime on Monday night.This picture is Tuesday night. He let me bath him and the toe. So it is much cleaner and scabbing nicely. The gunk has dried almost helping keep the toenail attached. Although I think it will still come off. See how purple the tip of the toe is from bruising. The underneath side is a much worse horrible shade of purple and green, the swelling is slowly going down, but it is still pretty big compared to his other big toe. He'll now walk if I hold his hands like you do with a baby on his one good foot and this foot curled and walking on the side. Still no playing. Sad day for Issac.